Muslima Success

When you think of it, our lives are a series of relationships. From the moment we are born, there is an instant relationship with our mothers and it is indeed one of the most beautiful relationships.  In Islam, the relationship between us and Allah (SwT) is also instantly commenced when the  Athan (the call to prayer) was softly made in our ears shortly after our birth.  Then we start to form relationships with other close relatives, friends, neighbours, teachers, and employers. And then, in sha Allah, we form one of the most important relationships in our lives, which can be the basis for a healthy and strong family and society – and that is the relationship with our spouses and children. Allah (SwT) beautifully describes the relationship between spouses in the Quran by stating: “ And among His signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put  love and mercy   between your (hearts); verily in that ...

The second most common communication problem is what we call ‘Relationship Icebergs’ – these are basically unspoken, unexplained expectations within a relationship that seem so blatantly obvious to one partner, yet are completely not acknowledged or recognized by the other partner. The result is resentment, disappointment, and hurt.The point isn’t to eliminate all expectations of those we love – the problem is that we assume, particularly from those close to us, that they are aware and completely willing to fulfill our expectations of them. Unspoken expectations are to relationships what icebergs were to the Titanic. So, although there might be only a glimpse of them above the water, their power to destroy is indeed very serious and can sink what was thought to be unsinkable. For more information, please see www.findingloveandmercy.com .

You know the typical conversation you get into sometimes with your spouse, parent, sibling, child, or friend: -“You did this…” -“No you did that…” -“You never understand..” -“No you don’t get it…” So the individuals in this conversation haven’t exactly demonstrated excellent communication skills, or offered any new solutions or reached a greater level of understanding, right? This happens when the way something is said becomes the reason of the fight, instead of the actual issue – so you start ‘fighting about the fight’. Such a situation causes a waste of time, hurt feelings, and can cause some real detriment to a relationship. Think about it – how do we react when we’re told we’re wrong, to blame, or made a mistake? We may become defensive or enter into attack mode, even if what’s being said is correct. So how do we resolve this? Stay tuned for the rest of the four most common communication problems. For more info, please visit www.findingloveandmercy.com

Stay tuned.